LOVE & FEELINGS

yesterday, wen i heard the news...
only one drop of tears..
and for the rest of the day, i could only keep quiet..
wen i was at the funeral.. my heart beats so much.. no words could describe the feeling..

mii, gibson, larry and daryl were the first fews that came from skool..
i tot it was more practical to spent time there then to spent time travelling thus we took a cab there.. wen i reach, the 3 of them offer incent to him.. the moment i saw his picture, my heart tear into thousand pieces.. it's him in his graduation clothes.. in my tots, it keeps fighting.. is it really him.. with full confusion, i decided to see him..
when i look at him.. the first thing that pop in my mind is...
this is not clifton.. this cant be clifton..
clifton is someone lively, always smile...
but this clifton, down there, looks so innocent, peaceful and cold..
where is the clifton that i used to see.. is this really clifton..?

after tat, the four of us juz stand at the back.. having the same tots..
it is such a waste.. he's a talent.. he dun deserve it...
all this.. keep playing in our heads.. my feelings was mixed.. i couldnt cry either..
jus felt that im carrying a heavy heart.. heavy feeling.. heavy sigh...
wen others came crying to mii, i really wanna cry out loud.. but i juz cant..
the matter doesnt get any better.. i went to see him for again, to bid goodbye...

this morning, wen i read the newspaper, everywhere, it's his picture..
the more i read on, the more tears came rolling down..
every paper tat i read, tears flow like a river..
everytime i read it, i juz couldnt stop crying..
i still cant believe he is gone.. i still couldnt believe it...

im just his fren.. someone not so close to him.. but we were frens..
mii being his fren, i already felt so terrible..
how bout his family?? how bout his gf? they must be feeling 100x, no 1000x worst than wat i felt..
terence, who couldnt visit him on the first wake, he must be feeling terrible too..
exco member tat had work wif him, must felt terrible too..
my zilra GLs, my fellow zilraian's, we felt the same way..
we hug each other, we cry on each other..

but here i am... i just can wish u rest in peace.. live well in the other world..
i will say my final goodbye tmr.. if im not working, i would send u all the way to mandai..
but im sorrie.. i juz could be at the wake.. wishing u the final goodbye..
i think... it's time for mii to let go...
like wat one of my fren say...
we shud celebrate his life, nth else...
he has gone to a better world..
Goodbye, Clifton..