Rely On Me
11:48 PM Edit This 0 Comments »rely on me...
had been a phrase that keep on playin in my head...
rely on me...
was the phrase that my bf use wherever he console mii...
i think it's just in me that i'm the type of girl who is independent on her own...
maybe bcoz i mature too fast or sth like tat...
& it causes mii to be a domineering person...
im always the one who makes the decision..
always the one who initiates...
to the point that im tired of doing so...
thinking back...
from secondary school to polytechniic...
i realise that i'd lost many things...
i lost my smile...
i lost my passion...
i lost my confidence...
and many more...
some, i know where it all begins...
but some, i dont know where it started...
even if i cld turn back time...
im not even sure whether i'll do the same thing that i'd did..
or change for a better...
i juz not sure...
everytime my bf said 'rely on me'
i took it as a joke...
and replied 'like real' or 'like i can'
but behind those words,
he was being serious and sincere...
and it makes mii feel that im egoistic...
as a guy, he definitely have pride..
but then, im just being the one ignoring it..
as his gf, tat shudnt be sth i shud do..
i realise, im nt a good gf...
instead of taking the initiative to lead...
i shud have taken the initiative to follow him...
i rely on myself too much tat i had forgotten to rely on others..
nt juz my bf... but my family & friends as well..
even after i've said these..
im now in doubt as to whether i shud start relying on other...
im scared to rely on others..
im not confident enough to rely on others...
but slowly, im losing all the energy...
slowly, im losing all the energy to make others to follow mii..
im tired... and restless..
this is wat i feel like doing now..
sky gazing...
& wondering...
can i... rely on u?
had been a phrase that keep on playin in my head...
rely on me...
was the phrase that my bf use wherever he console mii...
i think it's just in me that i'm the type of girl who is independent on her own...
maybe bcoz i mature too fast or sth like tat...
& it causes mii to be a domineering person...
im always the one who makes the decision..
always the one who initiates...
to the point that im tired of doing so...
thinking back...
from secondary school to polytechniic...
i realise that i'd lost many things...
i lost my smile...
i lost my passion...
i lost my confidence...
and many more...
some, i know where it all begins...
but some, i dont know where it started...
even if i cld turn back time...
im not even sure whether i'll do the same thing that i'd did..
or change for a better...
i juz not sure...
everytime my bf said 'rely on me'
i took it as a joke...
and replied 'like real' or 'like i can'
but behind those words,
he was being serious and sincere...
and it makes mii feel that im egoistic...
as a guy, he definitely have pride..
but then, im just being the one ignoring it..
as his gf, tat shudnt be sth i shud do..
i realise, im nt a good gf...
instead of taking the initiative to lead...
i shud have taken the initiative to follow him...
i rely on myself too much tat i had forgotten to rely on others..
nt juz my bf... but my family & friends as well..
even after i've said these..
im now in doubt as to whether i shud start relying on other...
im scared to rely on others..
im not confident enough to rely on others...
but slowly, im losing all the energy...
slowly, im losing all the energy to make others to follow mii..
im tired... and restless..
this is wat i feel like doing now.. sky gazing...
& wondering...
can i... rely on u?
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